Things I Don't Understand And Definitely Am Not Going to Talk About

BY JEN SNOW

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Things I Don't Understand And Definitely Am Not Going To Talk About

  • They thought that the subway was a fine place to eat sushi.
  • Soy sauce in small plastic cups.
  • And possibly sake. (Smaller paper cups that were not clear so I could not see.)

Things I Don't Understand And Definitely Am Not Going To Talk About

  • I wonder when I’ll miss you.
  • And whether that says more about you or more about me.

Things I Don't Understand And Definitely Am Not Going To Talk About

  • He said “I don’t get it,” in a way that made me realize: “he does not understand at all,” and that an explanation, in this case, was not necessary, could not help.
  • I don’t think he understood that either.
  • And then I pictured myself having to explain everything to him all the time, forever, because, it seemed, he might never understand, and so I just smiled and shrugged, though it’s possible I overthought it, and also no longer understood things too.

Things I Don't Understand And Definitely Am Not Going To Talk About

  • I fell asleep with the phone in my hand, at my ear, and her on the other end of the line.
  • It is not always a very smart idea to point out that an apostrophe is in the wrong place.

Things I Don't Understand And Definitely Am Not Going To Talk About

  • Amtrak train, instead of an airplane, from NYC to Atlanta: a terrible or terrific idea?

Things I Don't Understand And Definitely Am Not Going To Talk About

  • Instead of an essay, can I turn in a tightly edited list?

Things I Don't Understand And Definitely Am Not Going To Talk About

  • They are the type of couple that says “I miss you,” too much and too soon .

Things I Don't Understand And Definitely Am Not Going To Talk About

  • The only thing we have in common is that we do not dislike Nutella.

Things I Don't Understand And Definitely Am Not Going To Talk About

  • This new plan involves too much time for naps.

Things I Don't Understand And Definitely Am Not Going To Talk About

  • If you want to meet a jerk disguised as a Genius, there’s an App for that.

Things I Don't Understand And Definitely Am Not Going To Talk About

  • The Mac “Genius” suggested that I sell my laptop on Ebay “To a collector. As an Object.”
  • This time, on the way up, the stairs were unsettling, but I did not trip or fall.

Things I Don't Understand And Definitely Am Not Going To Talk About

  • Electronic devices that I broke in unrelated accidents this week: one laptop hard drive, one heart.